how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize