you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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