The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize