So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
