No stitches, just platelets and will power
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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