It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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