Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
