You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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