hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
