I just made out with a guy for $7.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
operation harelip BJ is a go
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
You're like the curious george of whores
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
