Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
