At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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