are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
