are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I need help removing her.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
