I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize