you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
