First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
