drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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