It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Randomize
