To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
