Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
