pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
