You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
