that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
