yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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