Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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