her vagine was all disorganized.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
