Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
