Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
