If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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