I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
