I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
