Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
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