If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
