Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize