Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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