We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
