i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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