Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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