Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
