Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I am naked and annoyed.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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