I will die if light touches me.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
