ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
