Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
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