New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
