Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
