i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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