Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize