and next time when you feel me up, do it right
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
