yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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