he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
