I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
